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My First Jummah Experience at the Mosque as a Revert

As I prayed in my mind and heart, I felt a sense of belonging. It was a different feeling for me. I heard the sound of a bird through the window. Was this my new reality? Am I in a dream?

As I prayed in my mind and heart, I felt a sense of belonging. It was a different feeling for me. I heard the sound of a bird through the window. Was this my new reality? Am I in a dream?

Salaams to all my brothers and sisters. Hope the pandemic is not causing additional stress to our already hectic lifestyles. So I decided to write about my first time entering a mosque since I reverted, and since the mosques were reopened because of the pandemic.

I always used to look at mosques from travelling in vehicles but I never thought that I would have entered one. It was a Friday, the Jumma day, and I was told that it was important for Muslims to attend the Jumma prayer, so I attended.

Not sure what to expect, I followed two friends who were eager to assist me. I was excited to practice the prostrations for the first time at the mosque as I used to learn them at home. What an absolute joy to practice what you have been learning at the mosque.

As I walked up the stairs, a cool, calm feeling came over me. I looked around for the first time like it was my first day at school. Only this time, I was no longer scared. 

Going to school was torment for me. I was always ridiculed because I am short. I was always judged by my peers, teachers even my parents. I finally made a decision for myself and not for anyone else. At the mosque, I was not judged or ridiculed. I just entered and prayed.

I also listened to the Khutbah, which was very informative to me. I looked around and saw absolute devotion. Everyone was engrossed in prayer. Such a peaceful scene.

As I prayed in my mind and heart, I felt a sense of belonging. It was a different feeling for me. I heard the sound of a bird through the window. Was this my new reality? Am I in a dream?

I have always found myself so confused throughout my life, turning to different places of worship, hoping to find my place somewhere out there. Finally, I feel complete. Listening to other revert stories out there has made me realize that I am not alone. 

For me, I finally found hope, something to hold on to in my life, or did it find me? Looking back at my life, I soon realized that this was the religion for me. Religion has always been a heated topic for a lot of individuals but once you have found the right religion that works for you, the choice is yours. I have finally made a decision that suits me for a change.

Honestly, being a revert can be a lonely journey sometimes. Shortly after I converted, I wondered if I made the right choice in life. I missed the way things were before but I made a decision and for the first time in my life, I will stick to my decision. To this day, it is a decision that I have never regretted. 

I will remain a revert until the day I die because when one door closes another one will open up for you. A wise guy once told me that I needed to believe in order for things to work out for me but I didn’t even believe in what he was trying to tell me way back then in 2015. I often wonder if my life would have turned out differently if I was a born Muslim but I am happy that I have found my way.

I wish the best for all my brothers and sisters out there and I hope that someday you too will be blessed with my experience. It is indeed a life-changing one!

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