He IMMEDIATELY sends an Instagram account. And I realize the problem.
He IMMEDIATELY sends an Instagram account. And I realize the problem.
Finding the right person to spend the rest of your life with is no easy task. Our parents generation often saw at most a picture of the person they were to marry before the big day. Nowadays the internet has turned the spouse-selecting process on its head. As soon as someone suggests a name, your first reaction is to Google them and search for them on all the social media channels…
The contribution towards this process of social media has brought about a unique set of problems;  ones that Hasib Noor aptly dissects in this Facebook post:
“A really beloved bro has been complaining he can’t find a bae he can share his love with and marry. Now, personal policy, I don’t help guys. The reason I don’t help guys?
When a guy “knows what he is looking for” and you know it’s better off they find whoever this 1 in 10 billion girl is, I never get involved. But after 5 yrs, I cave & decide to help this homie.
Wife and I make suggestions and of course… the guy says no to every single one.
“Not what he’s looking for.”
So we ask: send us at least a picture of someone famous you think fits your interest so it helps us.
He IMMEDIATELY sends an Instagram account. And I realize the problem.
I tell him,
“Bro, you’re looking for a woman with a team of makeup artists and photographers, not something real.”
He refuses and says, “No no! this is what I would be interested in!” (mind you this is just the looks factor, all other things aside).
So family suggests others but he refuses because they wore hijab and don’t have a makeup team with Photoshop air brush and potential plastic surgery.
The problem?
He cannot see past Instagram.
Where everyone is not only filtered and brightness the mess out with the right angles, but they’re almost not real!
After that, I gave up. I realized that exactly like this, is how Instagram and social media is potentially ruining lives, relationships and gender perception.
Do yourself a favor:
1. Stop imitating Instagram accounts
A) Men are steroided out
B) Women have a team of makeup artists
Both are often photoshopped.
2. Beware of false perceptions
People not only ruin their physical health but their spiritual and mental as well by believing these false perceptions of reality.
3. Your mind triggers like a drug
If you constantly feed what gives a rise to it, you become numb to reality.
This is why, among the many reasons, we lower our gaze.
4. Social media addiction
Don’t disregard your addiction to liking, scrolling, fav-ing, wanting RTs etc.
It can be slight but keeps feeding itself.
5. Be cautious of emotions online
Your emotions are on a roller coaster by social media.
Learn to control it yourself. Otherwise, it definitely is controlling you.
6. Be wary of who you follow
Don’t underestimate harms of constantly following people and liking what’s fake.
It may lead many to make horrible decisions and lifestyle choices.
7. Stop aiming to please others;
Seeking attention;
Wanting praise;
Worst of all… pretending you’re not doing it for others.
8. For guys and ladies looking out there:
Trust in God.
Really deeply turn to Him.
We rather try and search without prayer reliance.
9. Understand that:
You will marry,
Have children,
Find a job,
Look good,
And none of it matters if it’s not for the right intentions, you will just be depressed.
10. Remember your religion.
Our faith teaches us to seek love, attraction, chemistry, compatibility, but in reality and not in superficial perceptions.
So stop letting Instagram and social media ruin your life, relationships, and perceptions of the opposite gender.”
This was originally posted by brother Hasib Noor here on Facebook.
