How To Regulate Emotions When It Comes To Personal Growth

One’s emotional intelligence guides both their thoughts and actions and determines how their day and ultimately their life will go.

One’s emotional intelligence guides both their thoughts and actions and determines how their day and ultimately their life will go.

Islam is a comprehensive, intelligent, and practical life system where one finds equal respect towards all components of a human being. Islam regulates these components very beautifully to their full potential, rather than suppressing them or setting them completely uncontrolled.

In all Islamic teachings, emotions are given their place of importance as fundamental elements of the human soul. One experiences emotions constantly in daily life in relation to events and people and emotional interaction remains inevitable in this human life.

Actually, Islam recognizes and respects the whole range of human emotions. People are not denied being “human” and having their weak moments. They are allowed to experience all sorts of feelings, both good and bad because it is unavoidable and part of the human experience.

What Islam regulates is emotional balance and instructs its followers to make a serious effort to keep their composure. When one is emotionally balanced, their emotional intelligence becomes visible. They can then identify, use, understand and regulate their emotions wisely. 

Islam teaches moderation in everything, aiming to create equilibrium so that one is always at peace with one’s own self, the universe, and Allah. One must avoid extremes in negative or positive emotions, as any extremes are destructive if left uncontrolled.

11 verses to help tackle the different emotions we go through in life

Whenever one gets emotional, one should practice pausing; when one is angry they should pause, when one is stressed, they should pause, and when they pause they should pray. Practicing this will allow one to respond in a way that Allah loves. The true losers in life, are not those who try and fail, but those who fail to try. So those who try this, are never the losers. 

Those who can learn to identify, express, and harness their feelings, even the most challenging ones, only they can use those emotions to help create positive, satisfying lives. As this is a kind of intelligence that enables one to sense, understand, and effectively apply the power and acumen of emotions as a source of human energy, information, connection, and influence. 

Positive emotions such as love, hope, enthusiasm, and determination are strongly encouraged in the Quran and teachings of the Prophet (Pbuh), as they result in a positive attitude for us at home, in public, and in relation to the rest of the world and all creations. Negative emotions like anger, depression, hate, and envy are strongly discouraged.

A Muslim believer is thus is advised to practice strict control over those destructive emotions, and to repent if one influenced deeds or attitudes upon others. To do so, one is expected to maintain strong ties with Allah, and to draw strength and support from Him at all times.

If one believes there is an All-Wise, All-Knowing Allah, running the universe and that everything happens for a good reason within a wise and just master plan, then despair or envy, or sadness could be dealt with in healthy ways.

 A Muslim should know how to take the negative energy of destructive emotions and use it as steam to move forward in a positive direction, thus turning it into positive energy. The same applies to the energy of excess positive emotions. Instead of becoming euphoric or hysterical, one should re-channel this energy to use it for something constructive, rather than let it go to waste. 

Since no one can isolate themselves emotionally, Islam offers practical prescriptions for emotional interaction. It instructs to control the tongues and physical power when sad or angry. It also teaches that the emotional reaction must be in a dignified and respectable way.

The Prophet cried in sadness when he lost a son, yet refused to let people believe that the sun eclipsed because of his sadness. It means that no matter how frustrating or boring or constraining or painful or oppressive one’s experience may be, one should always choose how to respond. 

Controlling Your Emotions When You Feel Like Doing Anything But That

One should not let emotions take control of their actions. Instead, one should take control of their emotions. There is no excuse for causing hurt or destruction because one got “carried away” by emotions. There are no softer penalties for these irresponsible actions in Islam. Since these destructive actions resulting from negative emotions can only create a vicious circle of more negativity and destruction, disturbing the balance of Allah’s peaceful universe.

In the Islamic code of conduct, emotional intelligence is of prime importance. Modern research has also proved that it is an acquired skill that could be learned and practiced by almost anyone, and such a skill is a true measure of success in practical life.

One’s emotional intelligence guides both their thoughts and actions and determines how their day and ultimately their life will go. When one comes to know how to face one’s failures and starts learning from them, we ultimately reach a point where we get to the core of success.

But if one’s emotional abilities aren’t in hand, if they don’t have self-awareness, if they are not able to manage distressing emotions, if they can’t have empathy and have effective relationships, then no matter how smart they are, they are not going to get very far. 

So it’s very important to realize that how we choose to respond in every situation that life throws at us, either make us a master to ourselves or declares us a slave. As between a stimulus and a response, there is a space. In that space lies one’s freedom and power to choose their own response. If they choose to respond wisely, they are bound to rise and grow. This response is what will guarantee growth, and freedom and empower one to become a master of themselves.